Best of 2010: The Movies

Tons of movies, as always. Many good, but many bad. Here are my top picks, again by category. I’ll start with the bad and work my way to the good.

Crime Against Humanity of 2010 (Special Award): Sex and the City 2

Words cannot describe the sheer horror of these aging women romping around one of the most sexually repressive countries in the world. There are no sufficient describing words to identify the abject terror of a script that clearly should never have been written for a movie that should never have been made.

Worst Movie of 2010: The Last Airbender

It could have been good. It could have done the source material justice. Instead, M. Night Shyamalan was hired and darkness fell over the land. Asian characters? White actors will play them! Good dialogue? Who needs it when there’s CG superpowers and stuff? And countless millions had to suffer through it as their kids forced them to go.

Worst Movie of 2010 (Runner-up): Vampires Suck

I just had to mention this movie because it is the only spoof that has managed to make me laugh less than the movie which spawned it. Seriously, a spoof that makes Twilight unfunny. It’s clearly a paradox.

Worst Use of Talent 2010: The Tourist

Seriously, Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie and you still manage to have a terrible movie that should be thrown in the dustbin? The Tourist, you’re this year’s Nine.

Worst Action Movie of 2010: Resident Evil: Afterlife

I don’t even need to say anything for you to know how bad this movie was.

Best 3D Spectacular of 2010: Tron: Legacy

Light Cycles. Identity Discs. Arena Battles. With eye-popping visual fidelity and depth. Haven’t seen it yet, but it’s clearly worthy of this category since I don’t see Avatar 2 anywhere…

Best Action Movie of 2010: Scott Pilgrim vs. the World

You may have to defeat seven evil exes, but it’s an awesome ride all the way to the end. Nerds, you will eat this movie up. Anyone else, maybe not for you, but it’s still awesome regardless.

Best Animated Movie of 2010: Toy Story 3

Pixar, you render perfection. Only movie that made me cry all year.

Best Comedy of 2010/Best Use of Talent 2010: Date Night

Tina Fey and Steve Carell. Average script, but they elevated it with their immense comedic talent.

Best Movie of 2010: Inception

Dream within a dream within a dream. Layers of cinematic perfection that prove a clever movie can succeed in the face of inane sequels, terrible remakes and just plain awfulness. I will watch this movie again and again until the Blu-Ray disc wears thin.

Best of 2010: The Movies

Tons of movies, as always. Many good, but many bad. Here are my top picks, again by category. I’ll start with the bad and work my way to the good.

Crime Against Humanity of 2010 (Special Award): Sex and the City 2

Words cannot describe the sheer horror of these aging women romping around one of the most sexually repressive countries in the world. There are no sufficient describing words to identify the abject terror of a script that clearly should never have been written for a movie that should never have been made.

Worst Movie of 2010: The Last Airbender

It could have been good. It could have done the source material justice. Instead, M. Night Shyamalan was hired and darkness fell over the land. Asian characters? White actors will play them! Good dialogue? Who needs it when there’s CG superpowers and stuff? And countless millions had to suffer through it as their kids forced them to go.

Worst Movie of 2010 (Runner-up): Vampires Suck

I just had to mention this movie because it is the only spoof that has managed to make me laugh less than the movie which spawned it. Seriously, a spoof that makes Twilight unfunny. It’s clearly a paradox.

Worst Use of Talent 2010: The Tourist

Seriously, Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie and you still manage to have a terrible movie that should be thrown in the dustbin? The Tourist, you’re this year’s Nine.

Worst Action Movie of 2010: Resident Evil: Afterlife

I don’t even need to say anything for you to know how bad this movie was.

Best 3D Spectacular of 2010: Tron: Legacy

Light Cycles. Identity Discs. Arena Battles. With eye-popping visual fidelity and depth. Haven’t seen it yet, but it’s clearly worthy of this category since I don’t see Avatar 2 anywhere…

Best Action Movie of 2010: Scott Pilgrim vs. the World

You may have to defeat seven evil exes, but it’s an awesome ride all the way to the end. Nerds, you will eat this movie up. Anyone else, maybe not for you, but it’s still awesome regardless.

Best Animated Movie of 2010: Toy Story 3

Pixar, you render perfection. Only movie that made me cry all year.

Best Comedy of 2010/Best Use of Talent 2010: Date Night

Tina Fey and Steve Carell. Average script, but they elevated it with their immense comedic talent.

Best Movie of 2010: Inception

Dream within a dream within a dream. Layers of cinematic perfection that prove a clever movie can succeed in the face of inane sequels, terrible remakes and just plain awfulness. I will watch this movie again and again until the Blu-Ray disc wears thin.

Posted 1 year ago

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